Tuesday, March 23, 2010

My first ever Japanese wedding

How acceptable is it for women to show bare leg - not neccesarily at the wedding but maybe at the evening doo?

My first ever Japanese wedding

Legs are perfectly fine. The groom and his friends will enjoy! :-)

Anything is fine. Seriously. The bride%26#39;s friends will most likely be showing legs. It%26#39;s hard to ride trains and climb stairs in a long dress.

Take lots of pictures! A couple of years ago, I attended a wedding reception at the Mandarin, but left my digital camera in the ladies%26#39; room. I was pretty disheartened, but the next day, I got a call from the bride. The person who found the camera went through the pictures and found a group photo with the bride and groom, so they knew which wedding party I belonged to! :-)

Enjoy your first Japanese wedding!

My first ever Japanese wedding

It depends on how much leg. Show up in a micro-mini with no hose and it may be a serious distraction turning into a sideshow. Men won%26#39;t care. It%26#39;s the women who are going to be whispering amongst themselves.

Anyway, if you are a foreigner you will be given a pass. Remember that Japan is a conservative country, especially if you are attending a traditional wedding party (kekkon-shiki). If it is traditional it is not like a jovial western style wedding. It%26#39;s a formal event that is tightly scripted with tons of speeches, eating and drinking. Most people will be dressed semi-formal and a business suit slightly above your knee is no problem. Also, if you are talking about showing up in a short skirt without hose I suspect that might be pushing the envelope in terms of appropriateness for such an event. My wife said it will be no problem...but... and left it at that. I asked her if that means being given an ';ignorant foreigner pass'; and she just said, ';Well.....'; (meaning yes). Basically her point is, unless you want to be the subject of conversation or a sideshow, it%26#39;s probably better to err on the side of conservative attire. And no, an evening gown is not necessary. Business attire is fine. Remember that you will be in an environment where nobody wants to stand out and everyone wants to fit in.

Anyway, it will be a wonderful experience and you are fortunate to have been invited to such an event. Take plenty of pictures, it%26#39;s perfectly acceptable to snap away.


Are you going to a wedding in Niigata? Are you going to the actual wedding ceremony, the reception, or the ';niji-kai'; (second party with usually the bride and grooms%26#39; friends who weren%26#39;t invited to the reception because of price and space restraints)?

The room will be air-conditioned. So you%26#39;ll definitely want to be wearing hose. And something on your shoulders. That will solve Route246%26#39;s ';dress code'; rules and his wife won%26#39;t raise an eyebrow! :-)BARE legs, meaning ';no stockings,'; are not recommended. Bare legs are for beaches and fun in the sun. And if this party isn%26#39;t beach party, you%26#39;ll want to think about the air-con!

I wasn%26#39;t suggesting a dress code. I was merely trying to communicate how much she was interested in being a topic of conversation. The men will love whatever it is. It%26#39;s the women who are going to be approving or scornful, depending on how far out it is. The suggestion to wear hose is mainly to avoid standing out. Being a foreigner is enough. But, like I said, she will be given a pass for being a foreigner so everything is probably going to be OK.

Well, but you should respect local custom too.

Niigata is quite rural, so I would suggest dress Conservatively. Unless if you don%26#39;t care people say ';that stupid foreigner. Westerners are always like that, no showing respect to us...';

If you want to give foreigners in general bad name, go ahead dress like a stripper or whatever.

Nobody suggested dressing like a stripper. However, I agree that if it%26#39;s in Niigata, it%26#39;s mostly the countryside and much more conservative than Kanto or Kansai.

Um.............do strippers dress? (Just kidding, boys.)

Blondie is going to stick out like a sore thumb, er, be very ';special'; anyway if she is indeed a blondie! Or even if she isn%26#39;t, people will wonder how she ever got invited. I really don%26#39;t think women will care about what she%26#39;s wearing as long as it%26#39;s in good taste. And if they did care, no biggie. Just smile and act graciously.

But just to be on the same safe I asked my husband. (In truth, he volunteered his two yen as he%26#39;s a lurker and hasn%26#39;t started posting yet! lol) He highly suggested a below-the-knees skirt length and cover for the shoulders -- at least a scarf if the dress is half off the shoulder.

Funny, he%26#39;s never told me that. My skirts are never below my knees! Oh, well. So much for a man%26#39;s opinion. :-))))) (Kindly read that with a BIG grin!)

Just an observation but......I%26#39;m starting to think that men actually care more about what women wear than women themselves do!


Correction :

Just to be on the safe SIDE, I asked my husband......


My husband said be careful of color. If it%26#39;s black, make sure it%26#39;s a ';happy black.'; And ';no pearls.'; Yeah, I forgot about that. A string of pearls is usually worn for funerals. (Hence, no diamonds at funerals.)

No wonder people looked at me funny at one of the weddings I attended many years ago -- a black dress with a string of pearls! (The wedded couple is no longer married, so maybe I had a bit of insight. lol)

Thanks for your message - I may be blonde but I am not stupid, I certainly don%26#39;t want to insult anyone whilst I am there or come across as ignorant so I will not be showing up in a micro mini!! My question was based on the fact that I have a dress, which is just above the knee and I didn%26#39;t know whether it would be wise for me to wear tights with something like that!? I can%26#39;t really say what type of wedding it will be as my friend is Scottish and therefore getting married in a kilt to a Japanese girl - I%26#39;d imagine there will be some western traditions thrown in as well.

Bit confused now as I%26#39;ve had conflicting answers - see response above yours!!??

What do you mean people will wonder how I ever got invited????

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